Euny Hong (@euny): This ris a recent pic; makes me realise that my sitting pose and bored resting face are unchanged since high school
Seth Berkman: Do you see any similarities between Korean culture and American Jewish culture?
Euny Hong: People often say, “Aren’t Korean mothers just like Jewish mothers?” No, they’re not, at all. I would say for the most part, the mother’s role is much more subdued than in a typical Ashkenazi family. It is okay — not stereotypically, but in practice — for the American Ashkenazi female to be opinionated and express her opinion. In Korea, there’s still kind of like this thing: They’re not supposed to be really loud in terms of values, not supposed to want to have the last word, and they get really annoyed if a woman is right.
Seth Berkman: You’ve written about Jewish issues while living in France. Did your Jewish identity change at all while there?
Euny Hong: I basically had to suspend religion for six years. It’s the only country I know of where the word “secular” appears in the first sentence of the constitution of the country. You just could not really talk about your religion or ask people what synagogue, what church do you go to. France is not very Ashkenazi, and that was the only form of Judaism I was familiar with. It was the first time I was heavily exposed to Sephardic culture. I was totally discouraged from going to their services. In France that’s pretty much the norm — women are always in the balcony. I was like, I’m not down with this; it’s not worth it unless I start my own synagogue.
Seth Berkman: How do you know Angela Buchdahl?
Euny Hong: We were in the same dorm, basically, for three years. She doesn’t seem to remember this, but one of the first conversations I ever had about converting to Judaism was with her.
Seth Berkman: You wrote about how you didn’t feel accepted in your New York synagogue at one point. Can you talk about being a Korean Jew in New York and it being something people constantly question?
Euny Hong: This is why I think Angela Buchdahl is the bravest person I know. She could easily have avoided all of this, but she threw herself into it. It’s just not easy.
During the process of conversion and for the first few years, it almost was not worth it. I was younger and more tolerant. I was not the kind of person who would just walk away because of being insulted or whatever. Generally, the more religious somebody was, the more accepting they were. I had very positive experiences in Modern Orthodox synagogues, for example. If you go to an Orthodox synagogue, even if you don’t look Jewish, they kind of assume there must be a reason that you’re there. At a Reform synagogue or Conservative synagogue, which is what I converted to, they’re just very suspicious because there are so many people who go to shul and aren’t religious; a lot of them don’t even want to be there themselves unless it’s the High Holidays. So they’re suspicious of anyone who wants to be there who doesn’t have to be there. A lot of it, frankly, is self-hatred. “If you want to be like me, there must be something seriously wrong with you” kind of thing. I think it’s really unfortunate I had to see that side of people. It’s definitely something I’m still not okay with.
Seth Berkman: There was originally a part in your book about Israel that you took out?
Euny Hong: I wouldn’t say necessarily Korea and Jews have a lot in common, but Korea and Israel have a lot in common.
Bad things happen when you try to let things just happen. You can’t be passive. So as countries they’re really, really aggressive. They’re both going to rule the world, I think.
Euny Hong (@euny): Koreans invented the tackie selfie. Which is why Ban Ki-Moon is forced to put up with this kind of crap. #KoreanCoolpic.twitter.com/ztFxIhryUT
